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Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
08 December 2010 @ 09:37 pm
dear mania,

i hate you. i hate you. i hate you. stop making me feel this way, and think these things. i've only got 8 more years of this bull.
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
28 October 2010 @ 10:50 pm
dear kai,Collapse )
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
27 October 2010 @ 02:23 am
Dear bed,

We've been together for some time now. Each day i spend with you is almost like a challenge. You're too small, too hard, and i just plain dont like you. I need somebody with more support. Or at least somebody thats bigger.

Im sorry,

Posted via LjBeetle
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
10 February 2009 @ 09:20 pm
I bought myself the new Lily Allen CD and through all her douchebaggery I still really like her music.
Current Music: Not Fair Lily Allen
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
31 January 2009 @ 03:47 am
I love being so sick that if I don't get rest I will be admitted into the hospital. So guess what! Its almost four in the morning and I've had two hours of sleep! Hello hospital! If I don't end up in the hospital I will be surprised. Seeing as if I don't get any better and I've done all they can do for me as an out patient, I'm pretty much screwed. I am now officially a walking pharmacy, like Karen Walker from Will & Grace. Lets go over what I have to do:

1. Saline drips for my nose, slow down mucus production.
2. Inhaler four times daily.
3. One specific pill every 8 hours until gone.
4. Another specific pill 3 times daily until gone.
5. Another pill four times daily.

I've also had two injections, one antibiotic and one steroid, and omfg I could not walk the pain was horrible. I thought the steroid shot was the worst pain, um, hell no, the antibiotic was much much worse. Both were put in the same leg. I also did a breathing treatment for 5 minutes which helped out quite a bit, I wish I could just continue to do that instead of using an inhaler but I have no health insurance so that would be way too much money.

I still have not spoken about what I have. Well, when I went to the doctor Wednesday I had a sinus infection, upper respiratory infection, and laryngitis. My medication was not improving me and I continued to get a grand total of 4 hours of sleep a night from coughing and sore throat pain. I go back today after failing to improve only to find out that my "upper respiratory infection" turned out to be laryngeal stridor, which is "noisy breathing." Well that flap of muscle or whatever it is, I'm not sure I can't figure it out right now, turns out to be infected and swollen that it's causing me to basically suffocate. All I'm finding out about this is it's a defect at birth!! I'm 20 years old how do I now find out that I have a Congenital Laryngeal Stridor that is commonly found upon the first few weeks of birth. How special am I?

This is going to take forever to get over, now I kind of hope I get admitted to the damn hospital so I can get fucking drugged up and get some sleep and eat food!! I'm sure in the past four days I've lost like five pounds. All I can eat is yogurt and soup. I don't understand how I get so lucky in life. And since my dad threw a fit about me wanting to be on his health insurance he can pay the bill since he didn't want me on his in the first place.

Happy weekend!
Current Mood: sickmore like dead
Current Music: My Life Would Suck Without You Kelly Clarkson
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
19 January 2009 @ 08:34 pm
I can't stand being at home anymore. I hate it, my mom's bipolar disorder is out of control and it's driving me insane. I can't take it, I have no idea what to do anymore. When I'm not home I'm so fine and there is no stress but then I come home and I get everything dumped on my shoulders. I can't go to my dad's because I owe him money and he'll just yell at me. Plus, both jobs are in town and they would be 40 minutes away and I don't have any money for gas. I'm just really growing to hate everything and I'm losing faith in almost everything with my life. It's like my light is fading out and there's no saving it. My mom stole my anti-depressants so she could sleep and I've been off of them for two months roughly. I don't know where I'm going anymore. Sometimes I debate on doing drugs which is out of my character and not even like me, but the more I read about them the more I'm fascinated with it, even though I see the consequences of the actions being done. I guess I just really don't care what happens to me anymore. I wish I did. I wish I could tell him how I feel so he'd understand and maybe help me, but I can't even tell my counselor, I've gotten too good to know her. I lie to her about how I've been, it's been so easy to lie to people. No one reads this so I guess it just makes it easier to type randomly on the internet. I really wish I could believe there was hope. I don't want to be here tonight.
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: Second Chance Shinedown
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
18 January 2009 @ 06:15 pm
I have two jobs now. Huzzah! Bring on the non-life!!
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
04 January 2009 @ 09:34 pm
Your rainbow is strongly shaded green.


What is says about you: You are an intelligent person. You feel strong ties to nature and your mood changes with its cycles. Those around you admire your fresh outlook and vitality.

Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.


My favorite colour is green. Hahaha nice.
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
17 December 2008 @ 11:45 pm
My boyfriend and I made cookies in an easy bake oven today. It was really fun and pretty cute. I was all smiles and everything about it, I don't think it could have gotten any better. I made the best ones they were huge! I have a final tomorrow and I'm not too concerned about it. I'm totally going to own it. :) I'm half tempted to play the sims for a bit tonight, but just for a bit.

Tomorrow last day of class then work.
Friday a double shift.
Saturday 9-4 then going to B's house for an old fashioned slumber party.

:) Bonne!
Current Mood: calmcalm
Current Music: Breakdown Forever The Sickest Kids
Aiieeee! Its Ashlee
06 December 2008 @ 10:04 pm
Okay, so I have a picture of two children. Riley and Adam. They're hugging and it's so adorable. Riley came home with her sister Miley and brought Adam home. Miley doesn't seem to really care that he's there. I think that's because her sister is a show stealer for sure, OR Adam just likes blondes better than brunettes. He takes after his dad.

EDIT: I've added pictures of Miley and Riley being adorable. :)

Children are bastards and I'm going to be the worst matchmaker.Collapse )
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: Cut Up Angels The Used